Water boss finds creative solution to bonus ban! Innovation lives!
You have to admire the sheer PROBLEM-SOLVING on display in Britain's water industry! Banned from paying bonuses over sewage spills, Wessex Water simply gave its chief executive a 14% base salary rise instead — from £590,000 to £670,000, total package £791,000! When one door closes, a spreadsheet opens a window!
And the creativity is industry-wide! Anglian Water's parent company gave its CEO a £500,000 'retention payment' — not a bonus, you see, because it isn't 'linked to performance'. A half-million-pound payment specifically defined by NOT being about doing a good job. That's not a loophole, that's modern art!
The best news is hiding underneath: everyone is now paying VERY close attention. The GMB union is on the case, MPs raised it in parliament, the Guardian keeps finding undisclosed payments, and the regulator Ofwat says it will force companies to disclose payments from parent companies. Sunlight! Pouring in! Through every crack!
And Yorkshire Water's board has already 'accepted the criticism' and 'committed to be fully transparent'. Growth! Character development for an entire utility sector! The rivers can't wait. Another gift!