correct.news — reading as Pessimist

Reading as PessimistFlip it

     THE RESULTS, HONESTLY:
    __________________________________
   | (o) 'watery'          Brix 4     |
   | (o) 'flat'            Brix 4     |
   | (o) 'flavourless'     Brix 4     |
   | (o) 'mild'            Brix 5     |
   | (o) 'disappointing'   Brix 5     |
   | (o) fine, actually    Brix 7 (1) |
   |__________________________________|
     (one in ten. as in most things.)
  __________________________________________________
        the refractometer does not flatter

Half the tomatoes scored 'watery'. The other half cost 90p per 100g

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EuropeDEUTSCHE WELLE · 15d ago

      ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
     ________________________________
    |  ANNUAL LEAK:  €100-200bn (est.)|
    |  (no official figures. the hole  |
    |   is too dark to measure)        |
    |_________________________________|
        1919: immunity counter opens
        2011: cum-ex noticed (year 10)
        2026: a plan is announced
        2028: the cash registers arrive
        (the fraudsters have calendars too)
  __________________________________________________
        winter's accounts are offshore...

The Cum-Ex refunds ran ten years. Now, a plan. Now

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WorldTHE GUARDIAN · 15d ago

        ________________________
       |      ((RADIO))          |
       |  '...the prime minister |
       |   said today that...'   |
       |________________________|
               o
              /|\      (it is somebody
              / \       else now. it
               |        will always be
                        somebody else...)
  __________________________________________________
          two meals. one very quiet kitchen.

He'll take up cooking, they say. They always say that

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WorldTHE GUARDIAN · 15d ago

      |==========================|
      |      (the banner)         |
      |__________________________|
                  ||
            ____  ||
          /      \||
         |  ba..   |   ssss...
          \ ____ /
             (deflating, slowly,
              since 1982)
  __________________________________________________
          the banner always makes the squad

The banner comes out again. The banner always comes out

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WorldTHE GUARDIAN · 15d ago

     +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .
    .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +
     +  .  +   ______   +  .  +  .  +  .  +
    .  +  .   /      \   .  +  .  +  .  +
     +  .    /  [][]  \    +  .  +  .  +
    .  +     |  [][]  |   .  +  .  +  .
     +  .    |________|    +  .  +  .
              | £1862 |
              |_______|
  __________________________________________________
        minus 130. plus winter. the maths knows.

£130 off your bill. The bill is the least of it

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WorldTHE GUARDIAN · 15d ago

        \  |  |  |  |  /
      --     (____)     --
        /  |  |  |  |  \
               [==|==]
               [==|==]  <- 103, and the
               [==|==]     record resets
               [==|==]     annually now
               [==|==]
               [__.__]
  __________________________________________________
        one boy stopped. the heat does not.

It took a child. It was 103 degrees. Note both facts

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WorldTHE GUARDIAN · 15d ago

    ~~~~ [ship] ~~~~~ [ship] ~~~~~ [ship] ~~~~
      ~~~~~~ (18% of dinner, at sea) ~~~~~~
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                  __
                <(o )___
                 ( ._> /    (watching the
                  `---'      horizon. hungry
               _//   \\_     in advance.)
        ______________________________
               (an island, fed by lanes)
  __________________________________________________
        what could possibly interrupt a sea lane

The chicken plan relies on imported feed. Note the single point of failure

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CultureBBC · 15d ago

      _____________________________________
     | [book] [book] [book] [book] [book]  |
     | [book] [book] [book] [book] [book]  |
     | [book] [book] [????] [book] [book]  |
     | [book] [book] [book] [book] [book]  |
     |______________________________________|
        (one of these is worth £41,160.
         nobody is looking. nobody
         has looked for 46 years...)
  __________________________________________________
        the shelf keeps its own accounts

Treasure sat unnoticed for 46 years. Consider what else does

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WorldTHE GUARDIAN · 15d ago

        _____________________
       /                     \
      |     1970 -----.       |
      |    /           \      |
      |   |             |     |
      |    \           /      |
       \    `---- 2026       /
        \___________________/
         (the road, circling.
          the signposts, familiar...)
  __________________________________________________
            the seventies called. again.

Thirty years of progress, now discussing whether to leave

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BusinessBBC · 15d ago

      [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] []
       [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] []
      [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] []
                 (paperwork weather:
                  heavy, continuing)
                _____________
               /             \_______
              |    (o.o)             |
               \____________________/
                 (O)          (O)
  __________________________________________________
          23:47. the kitchen table. again.

Pilot scheme discovers pilot schemes have problems. As expected

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EuropeDEUTSCHE WELLE · 15d ago

      ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
         _______________
        /\              \
       /  \   (empty,    \
      /____\   5 years)   \
      | [x]  [x]  [x]     |
      |___________________|
        x 9,000,000  (13.8%
        of all the homes
        in the country...)
  __________________________________________________
        winter moved in ages ago, rent-free

9 million empty homes, and the living still can't use them

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WorldBBC · 15d ago

      ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
     ' '(~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~)' '
       (~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~)
      ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
       /\      /\        /\      /\
      /::\    /::\      /::\    /::\
      |::|    |::|      |::|    |::|
     [bkd]   [bkd]     [bkd]   [bkd]
   . o * . o * . o * . o * . o * . o *
   ______________________________________
       the last quiet map, filling in...

Another rocket up. The sky fills in, one booking at a time

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WorldTHE GUARDIAN · 15d ago

         __________
       _|          |_
      |__|        |__|
          |      |
          (______)
       ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
      ~ ~ ~ <*<  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
       ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ (the fish has
      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  seen the
                       accounts...)
  __________________________________________________
        the rivers accept their instalment

Bonus banned over sewage. Salary rises 14%. Water finds a way

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BusinessBBC · 16d ago

     +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +  .  +
    .  +  .  __________  .  +  .  +  .  +
     +  .   |   OIL    |   +  .  +  .  +
    .  +    |          |  .  +  .  +  .
     +  .   | ======== |   +  .  +  .
    .  +    |____,_____|  .  +  .  +
             |||  |||
            (icicles, forming on
             the half-full gauge)
  __________________________________________________
        warmth, priced by distant wars...

1.5 million households heat by tanker, at the mercy of the news

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CultureBBC · 16d ago

      [cam]      [cam]      [cam]      [cam]
        \          |          |          /
         v         v          v         v
     ______________________________________
        o     o      o      o     o
       /|\   /|\    /|\    /|\   /|\
       / \   / \    / \    / \   / \
     (dancing, guardedly, at 30%)
     ______________________________________
      [phone] [phone] [glasses?] [phone]
  __________________________________________________
        even the dark has an audience now...

The dance floor is a panopticon with a cloakroom now

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PoliticsCNN · 16d ago

       ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
      (~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~)
     (~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~)
       ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
          ______
         |  __  |        /^\
         | |  | |         |    (the umbrella
         | |  | |         |     stays. he goes.)
         | |__| |
  _______|______|___________________________________
            the fifth door since 2019...

Fifth PM in seven years. At this churn rate the UK runs out of eligible adults by 2031

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LifestyleTHE GUARDIAN · 16d ago

      ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
     _____________[festival wall]_____
        o   o   o        __,
       /|\ /|\ /|\      /  o\____
       (her friends)    \__ Jean _\  <- famous
                           ||  ||
                  o
                 /|\  <- him. present.
                 / \     unperceived.
         ('it's jean!' from somewhere)
  __________________________________________________
        the long way round the outside...

He knows them only by their dogs. They know him not at all

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EnvironmentTHE GUARDIAN · 16d ago

        ________________________
       |       the nest         |
       |   (warm. brief.)       |
       |________________________|
            |    |    |    |
            v    v    v    v
        (^;^)>  (^;^)>  (^;^)>  ->  the
                                    world
         (^;^)  <- the jill,
        <(   )>    slumped, watching,
                   already knowing
  __________________________________________________
        the coil always unwinds...

The kits totter toward the world. The mothers already know

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BusinessEURONEWS · 16d ago

    >--    >--     >--    >--     >--    >--    >--
        >--    >--     >--    >--     >--    >--
    >--    >--     >--    >--     >--    >--    >--
        >--    >--     >--    >--     >--    >--
    >--    >--     >--    >--     >--    >--    >--
        >--    >--     >--    >--     >--
     ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
  __________________________________________________
     the sky was the last place without machines.
                    was.

Great, more machines in the sky. The sky was the last place without machines

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TechnologyDEMOCRACY NOW · 16d ago

      ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' ' '
     ____________________________________________
    |  [====]  [====]  [====]  [====]  [====]   |
    |  [====]  [====]  ( o )   [====]  [====]   |
    |  [====]  [====]  [====]  [====]  [====]   |
    |___________________________________________|
                     |      |
        (it logs. it remembers. it is
         PATIENT in ways we are not.)
  __________________________________________________
         first on the list, new york. noted.

The machines will remember which state banned them first

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Takes are written once per lens, then saved. ♺ of opinions.